


Hear that?

by Swagza (zanthe)



Category: Xenoblade Chronicles
Genre: Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Xenoblade Chronicles Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-29
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-16 23:55:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5845894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zanthe/pseuds/Swagza
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you just need to give up, after all, what's the point when all you're doing is causing pain?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hear that?

   It's hard for him not to notice, the voice gets louder every day. It's hard to focus, every moment of silence is greeted by the cruel taunts, the threats. Zanza is in his head and he will not leave. Before Shulk had landed the final blow, Zanza had forced his conciousness into the back of Shulk's mind. No one had noticed it, not until now. Not until months later when Shulk began having nightmares.

  
   In the beginning Shulk was afraid to tell anyone, the way Zanza threatened their lives. He was powerless in the new world, the Monados destroyed, but that brought upon the thought, wouldn't Zanza be powerless too? All he could do was torment Shulk.

  
   And Shulk let him.

  
   What else could he do? It's not like medicine could cure the voice of a god. If it could, no medicine was that good yet. He just had to keep himself busy. That's all he needed. To keep his mind occupied.

  
   At least, that's what he thought.

  
   As the weeks went by Zanza's influence grew stronger, and it was noted when Shulk began losing time. At first it was mere minutes, a blip of unconsciousness, but the blips slowly grew in length, and soon Shulk began waking up in places he had no recollection of arriving to. It was then he decided to talk about it.

  
   It was a difficult thing to tell his friends, there's no easy way to say, "hey, I think the power-crazed god who tried to kill us all is living in my head again." It was likely Zanza was trapped there, and with no known way to remove an entity from your mind, they had to consider that perhaps this was something Shulk would have to live with.  

  
  Shulk didn't sleep that night.

  
   A few weeks later things grew worse. Zanza, realizing he was trapped in Shulk's mind, began doing reckless things. Shulk tried to hide the cuts that now decorated his body, but it wasn't easy to hide the once on his face. The salt in his tears burned the open wounds on his hands and face.

  
   Fiora insisted Shulk not be left alone for long, it was becoming obvious Zanza would do anything to hurt him, even if it cost them both a lot of pain, although perhaps Zanza didn't feel a thing. Perhaps all he got out of it was the joy of making the poor boy suffer.

  
   When Dunban snatched the little blade out of Shulk's hand, he was met with a cold, familiar glare. It was almost eerie how similar Shulk could be to Zanza, especially when Zanza was the one behind the wheel. They looked nearly identical.

  
   It took a few moments for Dunban to register the blunt nails digging into his arm, fingertips in a vice-grip that he was certain would leave bruises. A few moments of struggling and shouting when the grip suddenly vanished and the hatred in Shulk's eyes was replaced with fear and apology.

  
  Melia found him the next day with a kitchen knife lodged in his shoulder, blood pooling on the floor.

  
    Not even Riki could bring himself to crack a smile, seeing his friend in such a state was torture to the Heropon, to everyone.

  
A few weeks later, after his shoulder had healed, Shulk was sitting peacefully next to Fiora and Reyn. The atmosphere of calm that was so rare nowadays was shattered in an instant when Shulk, Zanza, had Reyn struggling for air. Fiora was trying to pull them apart, Reyn practically clawing at the hands around his throat. The malevolent grin Zanza had given Reyn in the brief minute that he'd had him in a choke-hold would haunt his thoughts.

  
   The hand marks stayed around his neck for a week.

  
   Shulk stopped eating that same week. Zanza was attacking where it hurt the worst, using Shulk to hurt his best friends. Even in a fatigued state Zanza possessed a strength beyond words. And even after his warnings, Shulk's friends refused to give up on him. But in the silence Zanza would whisper to Shulk everything he planned to do to his friends in heavy detail.

  
   Shulk decided there was only one way to end it all.

  
  His first attempt was stopped by Sharla, who slapped the knife out of his hand and bandaged him up, scolding Shulk and hugging him tightly. They would figure this out, she promised him. 

  
  The next week Zanza nearly shoved her off a cliff. The week after that Shulk was nowhere to be seen.  
How he'd survived such a fall astounded them all, perhaps it had been the will of Zanza to keep him alive. But Shulk didn't wake up the following day. The cruel blue eyes were only spared to keep the hopes he might return one day. That flame of hope was burned out quickly, until a mere glimmer remained, until months later the decision was made.

  
 In the end, it was Zanza's victory.

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea burning in the back of my mind for the past three weeks, and I felt it was time to get out of writer's block and actually make something decent, I haven't written anything story-wise in the past, I dunno, 7 months?
> 
>  
> 
> See a typo? Tell me, please!


End file.
